Dating is a concept of loving someone or being attracted to someone and going out with them to work out a relationship.¬†It is developing too fast within our generation. Being single in this day and age is far more complicated than when it was in the days of yore. The traditional dynamics of dating has that rule that masculine figure should always be the pursuer, making the first move, bringing the flowers, or offering drink in the bar or just simply put up the first one to approach. So clich√© for our generation!!
For us filled with all the enthusiasm of feminism and gender equality the equations have changed. Plus for a date you just need to pick up a phone nowadays. With so many dating apps and sites you need not worry finding a partner for a date, just flirt it out and blend. So with the technology at our feet we have found great many new ways and rules of dating. ¬†Dating apps has become a self-perpetuating cycle, even if you want to meet people normally and go the traditional way you can‚Äôt because everyone nowadays is using apps to approach people. For the generation of left swipe and right swipe, asking for a drink in a bar is too old school. When you can find a person in a sixteen miles radius on a mobile phone who wants to go out and search for a guy or a girl, which takes so much time. When you can find a whole profile in seconds and feel like you know everything about your date no one feels the need to go in depth to know person and take the path a natural course.
Dating apps like Tinder, OKCupid, Coffee and Bagel, Hindge and many other offer such possibilities to people. You can make a profile on these and the apps shows the people around you and then through left or right swipe you can choose whoever you want to go out with. Bang! There you go you found a date sitting in your bed.
So the basic terminology used in dating to understand a person better
- a) Benching: this happens when your date had been earlier interested in you but they have found someone more attractable than you on the other hand¬†they don‚Äôt even leave you. Instead they talk less to you or act weird but doesn‚Äôt clear out things with you until the other works. So you are¬†basically a backhand option, if the other does not work they will come back to you.
- b) Layby/bread crumbing and cushioning: this a situation when a person who does not want to be alone and is going through a rough time in their relationship starts flirting with other and keep them on the edge or interested in them but doesn‚Äôt cross boundaries.
- c) Catch and Release: you go on date and the person really seems interested in you and then when after a while when you start getting interested they suddenly become vague. People who have trust issues or issue sin their childhood act like this. They are interested in you but when they feel like you have started to grow care they will try to run off.
- d) Slow fading: this is mostly related to Catch and Release but people slowly cut off the dates when they feel that the things are going too fast. They usually opt for a coward‚Äôs way out and first become less available then stop messaging and calling and then stop altogether.
- e) Zombie-ing: something as that of slow fade happened with your ex and then after sometime they come back texting you and telling you that they have now time for you. When things does not cut off well people come off coming back again and again like a zombie.
- f) Drafting:¬†this¬†happens¬†when you meet and hit off really well in the start and when¬†certain amount of¬†time passes you slowly realise you are quite poles apart and it‚Äôs not going to work.
- g) Draking: these people are too emotional and dramatic in their life and posts up senti stuff on all social media and remain mostly unhappy throughout.
- h) Throwback dating: these people like the old school ways of dating.
We are the generation who is seeking out for love. Even more than the previous one. But sometimes it is so confusing that it frustrates the hell out of us. Whether we want to follow our crush or move on from it? whether we want to make the first move or just wait for the right opportunity or moment? when is the right moment? whether I like someone or love someone? whether someone is ignoring or is just simply busy. Ahhh!! So many questions comes with dating.
With the coming of the virtual dating we ask further¬†more questions. If you want to talk to your date, readily a phone is available and his/her phone number too but whether to call or drop in a text? Whether to add up an emoji or not? Whether he/she will reply or not or if they have a read a message why are they not replying? With coming of the mobile phone the dating has become further more complicated. So much of information is provided to us¬†that has created a relationship gap between the people. Like where is your date to who he/she is with. Then these technologies are also the problem of ego clashes and miscommunication.
Odd fact is the more the means of communication the more gap is created between people. We dwell in our assumptions so much that it becomes our reality. It is a really confusing world out there. You cannot sit in someone else‚Äôs mind and tell what they are thinking but we can understand some rules and terms to help us figure out dating in 2017.